“I’ve not had this much press since I got in a fistfight with a transvestite,” bellowed KZOK morning radio personality/former Partridge Family star Danny Bonaduce about his recent altercation where he was bitten by a crazed fan. “There’s no paparazzi up here in beautiful Seattle, they just don’t do stuff like that. All of a sudden I’m at a Native-American casino, and some chick bites me on the face. Now I’m everywhere!”
After insisting that being someone’s chew toy was not his most bizarre public encounter, we called Bonaduce’s bluff. What could be worse than being bitten on the cheek? True to his word, he delivered.
The time a guy bit him on the junk during a fight: “I was sitting on his neck, and he just leaned forward and bit right through my d***. I let go of him immediately, of course. I had to get one little stitch on the top and one little stich on the bottom.”
The time Robert Plant of Led Zeppelin spit in his date’s face: “A girl invited me to the premiere of The Song Remains The Same, the Led Zeppelin movie. She had been married to the Johnny Thunders of the New York Dolls. She walked over to Robert Plant. I didn’t know she was famous, I thought we’d kind of snuck into the movie. Turns out they knew each other through Johnny. She says something to him, and out of nowhere he spits in her face. A roomful of people had just seen Robert Plant spit in my date’s face! I went up to punch him in the face in retaliation, which was a hugely bad idea. Like, ten guys beat my brains in and threw me down a flight of stairs.”
The time a girl he was living with shot him: “This actually happened the morning after the Led Zeppelin incident. I woke up in my bed, fully dressed and heavily medicated. Johnny Thunder’s ex- Susie was next to me in her underwear. I was living with a girl at the time, and when I woke up she was standing at the foot of the bed with a collector single-shot revolver her father had given her. He was a policeman. Susie, who was six foot four, jumps into my closet. Laurie, the girl I was living with just unloads five shots point black into the closet door. I’m thinking there’s a dead giant in her underwear in my closet now. This is gonna be a really long day. I knew she had one more in the chamber for me. When she pointed the gun at me, I pleaded for my life. I admitted that I was a cheater, a liar and scum. I asked her if she was willing to go to jail for the rest of her life for a piece of crap like me. She said yes and pulled the trigger. I couldn’t believe it.”
The time he boxed against baseball star Jose Canseco: “I’m standing in the ring looking at him thinking, ‘Of all the mistakes you’ve made in your whole life, this is the stupidest.’ I knew it was going to hurt. I’m a never-say-die kind of person. He was going to have to knock me out cold, because I was determined to keep getting up until I couldn’t anymore. And I ended up winning that fight on a 2 – 1 decision. But his first jab sent me literally flying across the ring. I was running backwards to avoid falling down. I don’t know if he was being slow on purpose, but it was the only real hit of the night. I thought I hurt him once, but he didn’t even flinch. Jose had mercy on me, and I will be forever thankful for that. After the fight , he wouldn’t talk to anyone until he knew I was OK.”
The time a fan took his virginity: “Having sex with me is by far the nicest thing any fan has ever done. Back on the set of The Partridge Family, there was woman roaming around looking for David Cassidy. She was 23 and I was 13. People forget how huge the Partridge Family used to be. We’d have to walk around with FBI sometimes because we were viable candidates to be kidnapped. Shows like American Idol pull 23 million viewers for the season finale. Back in the day, our show had 40 million viewers every night. It was insanity. This girl couldn’t find David Cassidy, but she sees me. I go up to her, 13 years old, all of five foot two, and go ‘Hi, I’m Danny.’ I think she was like, ‘Ah, f*** it.’ She took me to my dressing room and made a man out of me. I like to say that I gave her the best 30 seconds of her life.”
—Scott T. Sterling, CBS Local